Finding The Joy

It's been a funny few weeks so I'm finding joy where I can.

Hi, I’m Becky, an artist and writer based in Derbyshire. I write about my life in what I hope is an honest and open way. I write about an array of topics, such as sobriety and neurodivergence, and about simply trying to find my way in this world. Please subscribe to support my work and to read more of my posts.

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It’s been a while. Once again. I keep seeing people saying that writing on Substack doesn’t always have to be deep and profound. We should all just write.

But, that isn’t my problem. If you’ve been here a while you will be well aware of that. I am the person who wrote a letter talking about being a band photographer for sheep.

My problem is that sometimes I just don’t have any ideas for something to write about. My mind is still whirring, a constant cacophony of noise but nothing that would make a comprehensive idea.

Sometimes I just feel tired and rather meh.

Sometimes it’s all of the above. And I don’t ever want to force something out because I am scared of having some time away, of taking a break.

We all need a break sometimes. And if you don’t allow yourself to take a break, you’ll end up with no choice in the matter.

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There has also been a lot going on in the world that hasn’t been great and somedays I’ve just been trying to stop my brain from going over and over it, again and again.

I’ve sort of being avoiding all my usual watches and trying to focus on fun things. This has included:

🌈The Bald & The Beautiful Podcast

Hosted by Trixie Mattel and Katya, who are Drag Queens from Season 7 of Rupaul’s Drag Race US, The Bald & The Beautiful is a really good podcast. They are both so funny and unashamedly themselves. I watch it on Youtube because I’m not great with just listening to a podcast, unless I am on a bus or something. I find it easier to keep attention when I have visuals.

🏰 Rewatching Castle

Castle is a detective series, set in New York. Richard Castle is a writer who begins shadowing a New York homicide detective called Kate Beckett to get inspiration for his new book. I will leave it at that so I don’t give spoilers to anyone who hasn’t seen it yet and wants to.

It’s a good show. It pretty similar to Bones but not quite as good, in my humble opinion. There’s no Temperance Brennan, for one thing, but they also have a lot more episodes with ghosts, aliens, Big Foot etc. Obviously, it is never actually ghosts, aliens or Big Foot who have killed anyone because it’s a detective show set in New York. I know these are just supposed to be fun episodes but they really bug me. I’m watching it for the comforting formulaic nature of a detective show. When it starts being all “Oooo, was it aliens?” I get annoyed.

(No, I’m not fun at parties.)

I still really enjoy it though. And they only had one big bad serial killer in the entire series so I’m thankful for that.

🤣 Last One Laughing

I’ve only just started this but it looks like it’s going to be a lot of fun. It’s ten comedians in a room and they aren’t allowed to laugh as they chat and do tasks.

Simple, yet really funny premise. It reminds me a little of Taskmaster which I love so I think it will be a show I really enjoy.

📚 Reading Tipping The Velvet

After many, many (many!) months of reading non-fiction books almost universally about autism, I am now reading a bit of fiction. I have read Tipping The Velvet before but it was many years ago.

I am a little weird when it comes to fiction because I do enjoy it but not much of it grabs me the way non-fiction does. Like, I am really enjoying my re-read of Tipping The Velvet - a nice bit of queer fiction which begins in the music halls of 19th century England is a wonderful reprieve from all the nonsense going on in the world right now - but it hasn’t grabbed me to a point where I can’t put it down.

Some fiction books do - The Lord Of The Rings, Dear Neighbour by Jane Claire Bradley, The Midnight Library by Matt Haig¹ and some of The Dark Tower series by Stephen King all grabbed me but there is no rhyme or reason as to why because they are all very different books.

But, still, I am enjoying Tipping The Velvet and it doesn’t matter that I enjoy it for half an hour each night instead of devouring it in two days.

🐑 Heading Out On A Walk

I have this terrible habit of, when I’m feeling bad, making myself feel worse by not doing the things that make me feel good. One of those things being going for walks.

My partner and I have had a week off together last week and it was a beautifully sunny week so we went on a walk. It was really nice to get out and feel the sun on my factor 50 covered skin.

Photographs from my walk, April 2025

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✨What have you been enjoying over these last few weeks?

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Thank you so much for reading.

As always, if you enjoyed this letter or anything resonated, please let me know by replying to this email or, if you are on Substack, by giving it a like or leaving a comment. If you really enjoyed it, please share it or restack it so someone else might find it. Thank you. 🙏

Until next time, take care of yourself and have a lovely week.

Lots of love,
Becky
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✨If you like my writing and would like to support me but can’t afford a paid subscription, you could buy me a brew instead. 🙂 Thank you so much! ✨

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